On Gay Marriage and Growing Up: Things I Want, Eventually!

So the other day, in a news-worthy state senate vote, New York passed gay marriage, by a margin of about one vote.  This is a big deal for a few reasons. First, there is another nail in the coffin of bigotry and discrimination, nationwide.  Second, there is no residency requirements to have a marriage license in New York state, which means anyone can run, fly, drive, train, or swim there and get married to any qualifying person they choose! (By qualifying, I'm guessing the only things stopping a marriage license in NY would be if an individual is already married to someone else, underage (and not emancipated) or not legally competent. So apart from the children, mentally incompetent, and  polygamists, this is a pretty awesome day!

From a more political standpoint, this ruling is a really, really, really big deal, because not only did it fail two years ago in a Democrat controlled state senate, but it passed, now in a Republican dominated senate.  Almost immediately after the ruling, Pres. Obama released a comment saying he's happy about the ruling, but that he still doesn't support gay marriage. Um excuse me? He wants equal rights for all, but just not that legally binding ceremonial thing that comes with tax benefits, hospital visits, adoption, and stuff.  I think he wants that other type of thing, whereby two gay men or lesbians just live together and get introduced as "my friend, [so and so]." 

I wish that the leader of the free world had more gall to stand up to his own convictions and previous promises to fight for LGBT rights ( um that means gay marriage, too, Mr. President.) instead of caving and turning these last few months before primary season into some quasi-conservative thing so John Boehner and the rest don't run him out of Washington.

It would be a lie if I said I didn't comprehend it, but the worse, and truer fact of the matter is, at the point where the president has such a high approval rating, (um ending both wars, finding Bin Laden, DADT, and so on and so on) now is the time for BOLD action.  If he truly wants to go down in history books for being as great or greater than his predecessors, it stands to reason he wouldn't want to look like the shy kid on the playground, pushing dirt around with the toe of his shoe, mumbling "Aw, shucks," while trying not to make eye contact.


NYC's Road to Gay Marriage

Op Ed from Times June 27, 2011

 Well, I believe that that dead horse has been beaten enough.  Now on to "growing up."  I doubt this will be what you were thinking it might be, but here goes anyway!!!

I'm still working on that fine balance between living as an adult, and behaving like a teenager.  I've found that I'm not particularly fond of going to bed early, eating cereal with some form of bran in it, and skimming the WSJ on my way to a "nine-to-five" are not appealing aspects of life to me at all.  So if this is what you were thinking I was going to say, congratulations, you managed to evade my fake-out reverse psychology. I'm super-mature, as you can tell.  Honestly, since I don't drink anymore, there's nothing I do that requires me to be more than a teenager anyhow.  I miss the simple days, as a friend recalls fondly, "of just waking up on Saturday morning, eating cereal and watching cartoons.  Those days rocked." 

We live in such a fast-paced, cutthroat industrial technological culture that we actually spend very little time interacting with real people in person.  A few weeks ago, I was walking down Broad St. (in North Philly) and passed dozens, if not a hundred or so people.  Nearly every single one had an iPod with ear buds in, or were busy maneuvering the sidewalk traffic, trying not to spill hot coffee, or lose that ever important game of Angry Birds.  Not one would make eye contact or return my "good morning."

When did adulthood become synonymous with self-absorbed?  Manners weren't exactly beaten into my childhood as one might suspect from meeting me.  I believe in being polite, courteous, and waiting my turn.  The drill sergeants in basic training instilled the obligation of greeting everyone you encounter.  Not only is it a good way to meet people, it shows some level of respect.  I don't expect that the dozens or so of relatively affluent people I encountered needed my respect or attention, but none even looked up long enough to reciprocate making eye contact.  These are the things that make me feel as though I'm from a different time, transported here against my will and better judgment, to see how well I can acclimate.

Kidding aside, my personal belief still remains. It is easy to actually be kind to strangers (a quality I've observed many times over in my girlfriend) if you actually care about people.  By virtue of statistics, it is easy to conclude most people don't really care about a random stranger.  I must also factor in the crime-potential, as well. *

This last part is more of a mental note to remind me of the imperfect, selfish nature of people, so that I don't chuck my hot coffee at some arbitrary person who happened to pretend to ignore me so that he or she could get to that next level of Angry Birds.  I have some bran to eat and stock market numbers to decipher.

Peace, Love, and Manners,
Shayna

* So it could also be a potential factor that I live in not a particularly safe neighborhood of a major city, and that people indigenous to the area are more accustomed to not making eye-contact, as to avoid attention.